What's goin on..... Again???

Okay, lets face it. We are in a recession. Our economy is going through a downward spiral and has been since 1999. It has been a steady decline, but we have really hit a low point over the past few years.

I have found out recently that many of my friends are going through tough times at work. People are getting laid off left and right. Even in my own career, which has normally been very stable, my co-workers are getting laid off. This is hard for me I am doing ok, but feel terrible for those who now have to go without a steady income.

What’s goin on? Marvin Gaye sang this song back in the 70’s with so much turmoil. It is time we speak out again and find out what is going on. We need to start asking the right questions and not accepting life as it is presented to us. Why are gas prices so high? Why are we spending money protecting other countries when our own borders are not secure? All these questions linger in my head as I am not happy with things.

Prayer.

Over the next few weeks I am taking time each day to meditate and pray. So many people in my life need prayer and healing. I am at the top of this list!! Our nation and world need prayer. My heart is beginning to open itself again going overseas and being a basic missionary. The life of 50hrs a week and filling someone else’s pockets just doesn’t seem that appealing anymore!!

I am asking that everyone take some time over the next month and pray everyday. Even if you are not a person of faith, you can meditate and focus your energy on the positive things in your life. Spread the love in your heart to one another and use that time to balance yourself. For those persons of faith, I ask that your spend some time with the creator and ask for grace. We all could use a little grace and mercy these days. If not for you, then someone in your life who just might have it harder. I am praying for all of you!!

Love you all,

Oliver

Tic Toc….

So it is happening. I never knew what it felt like, but it is happening to me! A few months ago a friend of mine noticed that I was looking at babies and children differently. I never thought I would have them, I thought it could happen, but my life would be to complicated and fast paced to have children. Now… I can’t get them off my mind.

Here is the sad story, I am 30, a decent guy, and have a good sense of humor. I think in the end I would make a great dad!! In my business I deal with a ton of people who are not good parents and see their children suffer daily from people who have no business being a parent in the first place. WTF??? How is it that the idiots in the world seem to multiply like lab rats, but the people who actually pay their taxes wait until their clocks have almost ticked out to have their first child? Sad!! I am not saying that everyone who has multiple children are bad, but the movie “Idiocracy” seems to be a fantasy that is coming true. The idiots have us outnumbered 2 to 1. It is true. I deal with people who just can’t seem to get it together everyday. Guess what… they all have babies on their hips…

Over the weekend I spent some extended time with my friends a their newborn baby. She is absolutely adorable and could be a baby model. I used to be scared to death of babies, as I would always be afraid to do the wrong thing and mess up someone else’s child. This baby was great. I was playing with her all weekend. She fell asleep on my chest and I was hooked. I wanted one… I want my own little shorty!! I am not going to rich in and just have a baby mama…but for the first time in my life, I felt my biological clock ticking… more like ringing the bells from St. Marks Cathedral. Oh yes, it is definitely time to settle down and make some moves!

Here is my favorite part!! I was that guy. The anti children guy, “ they will ruin your life”… well… the crow meat taste great because I am recanting my statement and understanding what so many before have. Children are God’s greatest gift to humanity! The ability to bring another life into this world is nothing short of divine and should never be taken for granted under any circumstances.

God bless all the children (I sound like some cheesy movie) but it is true. I hope that one day I will be get that feeling and put this clock to bed once and for all.

First Day of School

Today is the first day of school for most kids in our area. This weekend I could feel the buzz, as the Wal-Mart & Target shelves were empty from the mad frenzy that is that first day.

Being so far removed now, I reminisced over my childhood experiences. Last year I remember shopping with a friend for school bags for her children and wondering what it feels like to hold the keys to someone’s education in your hand. Elementary school specifically was such a huge part of ones development. You can go from being the “smart” kid the “Dunce” in the matter of one year. Since you usually travel with the same group of kids through High School, these stigmas can be hard to shake. I remember the first day of school in 3rd grade when I had Ms. McDonald, who just so happened to be the hottest teacher at the school. My best Friend Jason was in the class too. It was awesome. That year was so much fun as I listened to every word that came from Ms. McD’s mouth. I can honestly think back as that as my first school hood crush… (ask me later and I will tell you a funny story about that). That year went by so fast and I learned so much. Much of my development as a “smart kid” started there as I began to accelerate much more rapidly and eventually would end up in the gifted program in 7th grade.

My friend’s son is starting third grade today. He was excited for school as I was back in the day. Ah, the cycle continues, as I am sure he is set for some fun times. The pressures on the faculty and staff today seem unfair as too much attention is being played on the fcat and not enough on the development of well-rounded children. I think too many kids are falling onto the “dunce” category just because they do not test well, and now that is the only focus of schools so they do not loose any funding….This is a vicious cycle.

As I was very close to becoming a teacher it makes me wonder what I would be doing this morning as I am about to get ready for my chosen profession… Would I be getting kids ready to play instruments…. Sad that this was my life for 15yrs and now it is so far away. Funny…

So, my hat is off to all you teachers who are making the world a better place by shaping the lives of so many children. If by chance you are the “hot” teacher in school… Thank you, thank you, thank you!! To all of my parents, May God show you patients and understanding as you guide your children through the educational journey of life. To all the shorties out there… My prayers are for you right now.

Not coming back

Not coming back

As many of you know, I recently turned thirty. This is not so bad anymore as I realize that it’s just another year. The first few days before and after my birthday were some of the hardest days I have ever had to encounter, but I made it through and am now on my way to a new life.

I decided to shave my head as I always do in the summer months. Over the past couple of years I have noticed a rapid decline in my hair’s thickness, particularly to the front portion. In thinking about the remaining follicles, it is probably not a good idea that I take a razor to them, but I do. I am bad boy. The other morning I was getting ready to shave again and stopped to look in the mirror. After gazing at a very good-looking face for a while, I focus on my hairline. It was gone baby gone. I always knew it. One day the fro would be no more.

So, it’s not coming back. Like sands through the hourglass, so are the hairs on my head. I have to accept that I will be wearing the baldhead look for the rest of my days on the spaceship earth. The sad thing is that I don’t even have to shave my facial hair but once a week. (A trait that I get from my late father.) I shuffle through pictures of me with hair and will now have to chuckle, these days are far behind me…. “I use to have hair back in my 20’s”, is a statement I might need to get used to.

Symbolically, changes in our lives happen without question. No one knows how or why they do they just do. I have known that this change in my hair would come one day. I guess when it was time to happen, I am just not ready to say goodbye, but have to accept that my hair is gone, but that’s okay… there is nothing wrong with being a sexy bald brotha….

Kickball

Kickball

Kickball is a sport that I have been playing for about a year now. It brings me so much joy while satisfying my competitive side of life. I find myself looking forward to Thursday nights as a release from the pressures of everyday life. I have become a little too committed to this sport as I have also found myself planning life and even work around, yet it has paid dividends.

Last Thursday my new team, affectionate called “Your Mom”, won the kickball championship again. I have been on another team previously called the Blue Ballers, which was full of my Orlando friends. The Blue Ballers decided to take a season off. I won a championship with the blue balers three seasons ago and got to hoist the cup of victory for the first time. This year around with “Your Mom” was different. I found myself having smack around “Your Mom” in order to get things done. I would push “Your Mom” harder n deeper than I thought was possible…. Okay that is enough with the silly puns!!

This has faced me with quite the dilemma, do I stay with “Your Mom” or do I go back to my trusty faithful “Blue Ballers”. Oh the drama that we have in life. I have wn a championship with both, but I found that my old team will be coming back with a vengeance. My new team is good, but is not as athletic as the balers were. “Your Mom or Blue Ballers” Just sounds funny saying it!!

On the serious side of Kickball, I also am the charity director. Which means I am apart of the “Brain Trust” as Mike and Steve so humbly put it. Wanting to do things in the community is another passion of mine. I honestly find myself enjoying the charities as much as I do rounding the bases on a home run. Last year we were able to do a couple of awesome events. This fall I want to put together a big tournament for the Florida. We would raise funds for a local charity. Wish me luck.

The new season starts in September. We shall see what team I am on.

La Nuit Noir

La Nuit Noire

Bonjour, It has been a while but I will catch you up on me in a while.

Lets talk about the Dark Knight shall we! AAAAAmazing!! The movie was one of the better, if not, the best superhero movie of all times. As I was watching the movie, I could not help but recognize its greatness. I am not one to jump on the hype machine bandwagon and was a little leery going into the movie, but Heath Ledger’s performance was phenomenal.

As I examined his art at work, it left me with a number of questions. Was his performance that great, or was it overstated due to his untimely death? The answer is true to both. Unfortunately, we will never be able to separate the one from the other. As this as a backdrop, lets look deeper into this final epilogue from a great actor and a wonderful movie character.

Ledgers performance will become iconic in the years to come. His role as the Joker in the re-born Batman series will be seen as a superhero villain extraordinaire. (Look for look-a-like clowns running around this Halloween!!) As so many who meet untimely death, it is paradoxical that Ledger’s death brought so much attention to his performance. He has been a classy actor for years and really came to the head in Brokeback Mountain. (HEHE… I just reread that sentence!!) . It is sad to profit off of ones death, but the past cannot be changed. Ledgers death planned or unplanned, has made this film one of the most watched ever and has challenged me to question some basic beliefs and thoughts. Was Ledgers death essential to the success of this movie? If fate exist, was this almost written to be apart of the script and secure this movie in the pantheon of all time greats?

I know this. In life sometimes we can be apart of something that leads to something greater than we could imagine. It is not always the part that we want to play, but we have no control over the script, that is the director, and no rewrites will occur! Ironically, on the day I watched “The Dark Night”, apart of my heart was removed unexpectedly. (Figuratively not literally) Yet, by this loss, something greater will come about for them and many others. Without making Ledger or myself into a martyr, the parallel remains. That through loss of something special, something greater can return. Ledger’s death was terrible and something I wish it never happened. But the past is done, and we must find the understanding in the midst of the sadness. This movie will be an eternal remembrance of something special.

I find solace in these thoughts as my heart heals and I will learn to love again.

I have always had a faith in God. I find myself doing more and more preaching these days on the importance of having this relationship. It is my belief that God has a plan for all of us. Did God want Heath Ledger to die… to bring attention to this movie? Who knows, I do believe that the moral questions in the movie bring up so many deep issues that affect our society today. Any dialogue on these topics will be blessing. I know that Ledger’s performance will be considered historic in years to come. Through his death Ledger, will inspire many minds to do wonderful things… even if it is seeing the beauty of the dark night.

“Suddenly, the night does not seem so dark, and the morning is just a couple moments away. I can see the sunlight in the distance, fighting back the dark, and bringing the joy of a new day. My heart will take these rays of hope and keep them hidden in my soul.”-OK

30

30 Thought

I’m 30. That’s right, the Big O is 3 O. Wow, I must tell you that it feels different. To be honest, my twenties was a decade of transition that has brought me to where I am today. Around my birthday every year, I usually take time to reflect on all the good and bad that have happened.

This year was a little different. Found myself in an unfamiliar place. I was with my mom. It was nice. I spent the morning with the person who gave me life. She told that she was proud of me and gave me her blessing. She mentioned how much joy I have given her. We embraced and a tear fell as I thought of my father, as I know he would be proud of me too. It has been 9 years since I last hugged the man who also gave me life; the sting is still there as though it were yesterday. I have come to embrace the pain and relish in his love for me. In all that I do, it is the hopes and dreams of my parents that drive me. Their constant sacrifices for me have made me the man I am. My life is an extension of their dreams, and now my dreams are his….

I have grown so much in 30 years. I look at old pictures of myself from high school and can’t believe I was ever that skinny!! Life is series of changes. These changes are necessary in the creation of our personal character. As I am going through changes right now, I realize the beauty of life. I thank God that I have been given the time I have. It is so wonderful to wake up each day despite the despair and hard times that we face. I have a faith that will see me through. This too shall pass, and I am sure that the story of my life has a few more pages to be written.

I thought about Jesus. According to biblical records, he started his ministry at age 30. I don’t think I will be leading the world to salvation, but it also puts my next portion of life in perspective. Can one person save the world? Can the power of one be so great that it inspires people to do the impossible? To walk on water? No, I don’t think I will be doing that, but what can I do? How can I impact people for good? What have I done today to make the lives of my neighbors better? I have asked myself this question often lately. I find myself far too often being cynical to those less fortunate. I pray that in the time I have been given that I help those in need. Maybe then I will start working on that water onto wine trick!

I AM

I AM

The other day I was watching “The Prince of Egypt”. It was that animated movie about Moses and the 10 commandments. One of my favorite parts of that story is when Moses asks God his name. He simply states “ I AM”?? Well that solves and answers to a ton of questions doesn’t it? I Am? Is that the best we could do? I am sure that this story lost some of its authenticity throughout the years. “I AM”, was probably Andy or something that lost a couple of letters along the way. Regardless, “I AM” has been a staple in our English language that has never really lost its power.

At the university of Kansas the fight song is entitled “I’m a Jayhawk” I have probably listened, played, and directed this song 10,000 times in my extended stay in Lawrence. The title says it all. I Am A Jayhawk!! Shortened, but still exclaims the pride one feels in associating themselves with the school, mascot, and culture of Kansas University. Ask any Kansas student to sing the school’s alma mater and rock chalk chant and you will understand a whole new meaning of passion.

So what am I? I thought about this question today. I AM _______ Blank? So many words can fill that space. I am what? What is it that encompasses all of me in a single phrase? It was so much easier to sing along and not think about the words of our fight song. What are we? Who are we? I would love for someone to say Oliver, you are Christ. Oliver you are Love. You are Peace. You are Understanding. You are Patients. But I am not these things all the time. I am also Anger….at times. I am hate…when stuck in traffic. I am selfish. I am wrath. I am sloth. I am an asshole. Fortunately not all the time am I these lesser qualities, but they all still exist within me along with the good.

I am Oliver. The original, the unpredictable, the unprecedented. I am 31 flavors of life and then some. It is one of those things that I am come to grips with and embraced. I am throwing 7 kinds of smoke these days and loving each drop that life has to offer!! Through this I have learned the things about myself that I do not want to be. I am working on those. Replacing the bad flavors with the good is our true calling. I am a work in progress for sure.

Understanding that God encompasses all acts of life sheds some light on the “I AM” ness of that statement. Something that magnificent could never be summed up in one world. God’s power is boundless; words could never do him justice.

A candle in the wind

A single candle sits in my room. It is a bright red candle that was a move in gift from a friend. From time to time I light this candle to counter the stale smells that can linger from earlier cooked food. The sweet smells are soothing after a stressful day. I know this sounds quite feminine, but it is the truth.

As I came out the shower tonight, the previously lit candle had filled my room with a mixture of strawberries and cream aroma that are about to put me right to bed. I turned of the light and stared at the candle as it illuminated my room. The red glow of the candles wall serves as a mini night-light. As much as I would want to sleep with it burning, I have seen one too many videos on what happens. So I just looked into the flame for a little while and reminisced.

Fire can be so basic as it can also be so destructive. It is one of the most basic elements we need to survive. If I were ever on a desert island my first instinct would be to create fire. I don’t think my boy scout skills are were they used to be, but I think I could manage.

Fire can also be passion. I often think about some of the most romantic nights of my life involved candle burning?? I don’t know why, but for some reason it always seemed to heighten the mood of the carnal pleasure that later ensued. A candle light dinner is still the first page in the book of romance? All this from a simple combustion of elements in a small space of air? Comical at best how this happens.

Unfortunately, what fire can create it can also take away. A few firefighters lost their lives today trying to keep others from these same passionate flames. Irony at its best. How can one item manifest itself in so many ways? The ability to sustain life and destroy it without itself changing. In San Francisco, one of the city’s trademark landmarks is Coit Tower. This pillar stands on the pinnacle of a hill in the north beach district and is a San Fran must see. The tower itself is a tribute to the firefighters who saved the city from fire at the turn of the century. The top of the tower is shaped like a fire hose. It is a interesting sight for a city that is full of quirks.

No real point to this blog, just a few random thoughts that came to me as I was getting ready to blow out my candle. I guess my next blog should be about water and wind!!

Memorial Day Thoughts

The Gospel of John 15 says this:

15:12 My commandment is this—to love one another just as I have loved you 15:13 No one has greater love than this—that one lays down his life for his friends.

This is one of my favorite passages in the Bible. Jesus commands us to simply love one another. Not so tough right, but he also alludes to the ability of the ultimate sacrifice that one can give in the name of love.

Last night I started watching the series Band of Brothers. It was not planned, just a funny coincidence that it coincided with the Memorial Day weekend. A few days ago I read a story of a puppy that was returned to the family of a 22-year-old soldier who recently lost his life in Iraq. It has been said that every generation has its war. After the Civil War, it was the Spanish American War. Soon to follow was WWI, WWII, Korea, & Vietnam. In the 80’s the Cold war reached its heights, but ended abruptly with the ending of the Soviet Regime. Over the past 15 years our conflict has been centered in the Middle East. My generation has traded in green army fatigues for sand colored ones.

I have said this numerous times, but just to clarify once again. I am a patriot. I love America. I am very proud of my Jamaican heritage, but this country is still the greatest one earth. In any loving relationship, you may love them to pieces, but just may not be happy with them all the time.

I take my freedom for granted quite often. In an hour or so I’ll be heading down the road to the beach to enjoy the holiday with some friends. This trip will only be impeded by stoplights and not security checkpoints. Something as simple as going to the beach without thoughts of personal safety is a freedom we all take for granted far to often.

In California one of my good friends & co-workers was a refugee from Bosnia. He was younger than I was by three years, but everyone thought he was in his 30’s. One day we got to talking about everything that happened. He was excited about telling his story, but after he showed me some of his scars I understood how some wounds will never heal. He was so thankful for the United States coming in at that time or he said he would probably not be here. This made me proud of our country to know that we have done some good after the dust had settled. I pray one day I will meet someone from Iraq and know we have had the same effect on that country.

Yesterday a couple of kids from my church are already signed up from the military. Seeing folks younger than me going off to fight in a war before they have really got a chance to live is something that does not sit well with me. I understand the situation, but also fear that sending our smartest individuals of to a country that did not ask to be liberated may not be the best of ideas. Despite my personal distain for our current war, I fully support any and every person who has ever donned a uniform in the name of protecting our freedoms.

So truly on this Memorial Day, I say thank you to all the soldiers who have given the ultimate sacrifice for my sake and the freedoms I enjoy all to well. Understanding the message of John 15 makes me appreciate the lives of all those who have been lost.

No greater love has ever been shown.